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Flinius' ED/PreE Journal

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  • Flinius' ED/PreE Journal

    Background

    I'm 39 and had sex for the first time last year (yes, late bloomer). I was a chunky kid, but have been eating healthy for the past 10+ years and I thought I was in pretty decent shape -- 6'0", 150 lbs. Unfortunately, I'm also the typical Millennial that sits way too much and grew up jacking off to porn since I was 12 (photos, then videos).

    When I first attempted to have sex, she was on top, I was rock hard, and as she was putting the condom on, I lost my erection. I didn't even know that was possible. Second time, same thing. Third time, finally had sex and lasted a few minutes before cumming. Fourth time, lost erection again. So damn frustrating.

    That led me on a journey to figure out what's wrong with my body/mind. I can get an erection just fine, but I can't maintain it without constant stimulation, even when masturbating. That leads to performance anxiety and PreE.

    I came across kegels and started doing them, which of course just made things worse since I most likely have a tense PF. I can easily do 100+ kegels and hold for over minute without a problem, but I stopped doing those late last year.

    At one point my gf and I broke up and I got a Fleshlight to help train myself. Holy shit, I wish I had gotten one of those 20 years ago! It felt so real and I lasted less than 10 seconds the first time. Worked my way up to 20+ minutes. When my gf and I got back together about a month later, sex started out better, but I was still having issues with maintaining erection and lasting more than 10 minutes.

    In May I was on the SexOver30 subreddit and someone mentioned Angion Method, which then led me here. Since then it's been a crash course on RKs, Hindi squats, yoga, stretching, and workout routines. I also realized I constantly clench my PF/ass, so I keep reminding myself throughout the day to relax.

    I tried Angion Method 1 a few times to see if it would help with EQ/maintaining my erection. I didn't care at all about my size, but I saw results within the first few sessions. Unfortunately, it also shot my PreE issues through the roof because I became super sensitive. It felt great, but I had zero control. I even orgasmed a few times during foreplay, which was normally not an issue. Sometimes it felt like I was near an orgasm without anything even touching my dick.

    In June I sent a PEGym member a couple pictures of my posture and he said my abs and glutes are underdeveloped, so that's mainly what I've been working on for the past couple weeks. I figured since I've learned so much from the members of this forum, I should post my progress as well.

    Medical PF Issues/History

    - As a toddler I developed an inguinal hernia. My parents were worried about having surgery done on their baby, and the doctor told them it might close up as I get older, so I never had the surgery. It never fully closed, so it was always enlarged around my right testicle. It would fluctuate from slightly to significantly enlarged based on what I was doing, but rarely caused any pain.

    - I finally decided to get the hernia fixed when I was 30. I ended up with a hematoma and as that was healing, my testicle retracted up to my abdomen. I had a second surgery to fix that, but the idiot surgeon ended up killing the testicle. I saw a different urologist after that, and he said it was best to leave the dead testicle there so long as it doesn't cause me any pain (which it doesn't), so that's still in me.

    - As a kid I didn't like using public bathrooms, so I used to "hold it in," which probably put a lot of strain on my PF. I did that up until maybe 12-13 years old.

    - For several years I've had to "milk" my perineum to get the last drops of urine out (sometimes drops, sometimes still quite a bit). I thought it was just me getting older, but as I've been researching PF issues for ED/PreE, I came across Post Micturition Dribbling (PMD). Seems to fit my issues and yet another symptom of PF imbalances.

    - I sometimes have to pee more frequently -- like 5 to 10 minutes after I just went.

    - Several years ago I was riding my bike and developed severe knee pain. I went to the doctor and had an MRI on my knee, but they couldn't find anything wrong. They figured it was an IT band issue, which now seems like it was more to do with tight hips/pelvic area.

    - I don't get pre-cum when I first get an erection. Only time I get pre-cum is if I get an erection and then lose it. When it goes down, I get some pre-cum and then can get hard again (most of the time).

    - I have always been a "dribbler" and have never shot a load.

    - I had a testosterone test done last year and the results were 547.7 ng/dL, 107.9 ng/dL (19.7%) free/weakly bound.

    - I had a Men's Health Panel done through Quest and my Vitamin D was 29 ng/mL (supposed to be 30 minimum and probably more in the 50-60 range). I started taking Vitamin D supplements and as of last month I'm up to 44. Everything else (PSA, cholesterol, etc) were good. My testosterone was up to 622, but it didn't have free/weakly bound numbers.

    Progress

    No porn for 14+ months now.

    Hindi squats - I went from straining to hold 30 seconds to comfortably lasting over a minute so far. With a 20lb weight held in a goblet squat, I can stay for 3+ minutes and get a good, deep stretch in the PF. I feel my hips and knees have loosened up significantly and now my weak/tight points are my ankles.

    Flexibility - I can now lay on the floor and put my ass against the wall, with legs straight up the wall. Normally I was so tight that my ass had to stay several inches away from the wall.

    Here's what I've been doing:

    Every Day:
    - Hindi squat throughout the day, 15+ minutes worth.
    - Relax my PF as often as I think about it. No idea why I keep clinching so much!
    - Sit on a tennis ball for several minutes
    - Lots of stretches for PF/lower body

    Every Other Day:

    - Single leg raised glute bridges. Raise/Lower 10 times, then hold for 30-40 seconds.
    - Hip thrusts
    - Donkey Kicks
    - Goblet Squats
    - This routine: https://youtu.be/gYPbCAUMj0s
    - Hollow Holds
    - Tibialis Raises
    - Calf Raises
    - Military Press w/ Dumbbells
    - Bicep Curls
    - Shoulder Shrugs
    - Tricep Extensions
    - Jog 2-3 miles twice a week
    - Sprints for 5-10 minutes twice a week

    I don't do these all on the same day. Normally I have an abs/glutes day and an upper body day.

    I'm going to open my posture pictures to everyone. Feel free to give any feedback/recommendations!
    Last edited by Flinius; 07-06-2021, 10:53 AM. Reason: Added more details

  • #2
    Welcome Flinius. Looking forward to hearing more about your progress.

    Be sure to click on the START HERE! button towards the top of this page for good information.
    Start: BPEL 6.75', EG 5.8", BPFL 4.5", FG 4.7", BPFSL 7.0"
    05/2021: BPEL 7.65”, EG 6.0”, BPFL 5.8”, FG 5.0", BPFSL 8.0"
    Goal: BPEL 8.0", EG 6.0", BPFL 5.75" FG 5.0", BPFSL 8.5"

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    • #3
      We are kind a in the same boat. I also have EQ problems somewhat, not to such an extent that it doesnīt work at all, but not amazingly. I can easily get an erection but maintaining it is another one. Then also the PME.

      For me the problems is most likely weak abs/glutes too. Have always been training my anterior chain and leaving the posterior chain behind a bit.

      Do you not train any lower body besides just glutes in your workout routine? Also, did you see any benefits with the yoga video you've posted?

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Mudita View Post
        Do you not train any lower body besides just glutes in your workout routine? Also, did you see any benefits with the yoga video you've posted?
        Lower body training is glute exercises, squats, jogging, sprinting, tibialis raises, and calf raises (need to add that to my list above).

        I have seen some benefits, but I started so many things at the same time, I don't know what can be attributed to just the yoga video. I do feel good muscle contractions doing the poses, so hopefully they are helping along with all the other exercises/stretches I'm doing.

        I was reading through your journal and came across this:
        "I have peeing problems where I canīt pee fully everytime I go."

        I have the same issue as well. I can go pee, then five minutes later it feels like I have to go again. I also have to "milk" my perineum to get the last amount out. While researching PF issues, I came across Post Micturition Dribbling (PMD), which matches my issue. I'm scheduled to see my primary doctor on Friday and a urologist next Friday.

        I'm going to add a "Medical Issues" section to my original post to give a little more background.

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        • #5
          I've noticed I can control myself a lot better during shower sex. Perhaps it's the hot water and being more relaxed? Or that we're not moving around very much? My gf normally starts off with stroking my dick, we start kissing, I start fingering her, and then we have sex standing upright (she's only an inch shorter than me). It feels great, yet I feel like I have much better control than when in bed or standing upright out of the shower. Most of the time we don't even go until orgasm -- it's just a fun intermission from showering.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Flinius View Post
            I've noticed I can control myself a lot better during shower sex. Perhaps it's the hot water and being more relaxed? Or that we're not moving around very much? My gf normally starts off with stroking my dick, we start kissing, I start fingering her, and then we have sex standing upright (she's only an inch shorter than me). It feels great, yet I feel like I have much better control than when in bed or standing upright out of the shower. Most of the time we don't even go until orgasm -- it's just a fun intermission from showering.
            How long would you say you last during your shower sex?

            Maybe instead of being more relaxed you are actually more tensed up?... Let me explain: Normally people are way more careful moving around in a shower than on normal ground. Itīs slippery everywhere and most of us already had the experience of falling in the shower or at least nearly falling so we are more careful. In that position maybe your body locks up freezing your hips in a certain position (PPT?) and you are moving your back/whole body to thrust. Itīs like when itīs slippery outside of a pool and people walk around like ducks with a stick up their asses.

            So maybe next time you have shower sex try to notice if your thrusts come more from your back or your hips, relative to in bed sex. I would be really curious to know.

            Comment


            • #7
              A couple progress updates:

              Butterfly Pose Up Wall - When in this pose, I used to be able to wedge my arm between my knees, then push with my fingers to help spread my legs a little more. Last night I was doing the pose and my adductors were loose enough that I couldn't touch from knee to knee. I had ~1.5" between my outstretched fingers and my knee! So, progress there. My adductors still feel SUPER tight though. Those and my ankles need some serious work. I spent at least 20 minutes in Hindi/Goblet/Sumo squats so far today.

              My gf woke me up by playing with my morning wood. Lots of slow stroking, then she got on top of me and rubbed my glans against her clit for a while. Good news is I didn't orgasm (when doing Angion Method that would have put me over the top) and I could just enjoy the sensations. At one point she was so light on rubbing that I couldn't feel it, so I started to feel the anxiety of "oh no, I'm going to lose my erection" coming on. Instinct was to start kegeling. Erection went down a little bit (maybe from 100% to 95%) and then I realized I should be focused on the hot girl on top of me -- not my erection. I stopped kegels and started running my hands on her body and relaxed into it. Erection went back to 100%. She laid down on top of me and I grinded against her for a bit. No orgasms for either of us -- just a fun, relaxed way to start the day -- minus the short panic attack. I really need to figure out how to keep an erection for at least a minute or two without stimulation!

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by nomorepre View Post
                How long would you say you last during your shower sex?
                I read through your journal last night and it made me wonder if shower sex puts me in a PPT position. I know I brace my legs a bit more to make sure we don't slip, and my knees are bent a little bit more for the right positioning. Perhaps that draws my hips into PPT.

                We haven't gone until I orgasm in the shower, so I'm not sure how long I can last. I think the longest we've gone is about 5 minutes of continuous thrusting (not including stroking/foreplay) and I always felt good control. Even after we stop, I have a good erection for at least a minute or two without stimulation. Which, as I mentioned in my last post, is not always the case.

                I'll pay more attention to hip tilt the next time we have shower sex, and also try to stay in PPT the next time we have sex anywhere. That would be awesome if locking my hips and thrusting with my back/body led to a crazy 20+ minute thrusting session.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Your testosterone is a bit meh for your age there are a number of natural steps you can take to improve it . The start point would be how is your sleep?

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Hi Pegasus, thanks for your reply! I've read a lot of great posts from you over the past few weeks.

                    Sleep is pretty good. I normally fall asleep by 11pm, wake up around 5-6am to go pee, then fall back asleep until 8ish (no alarm clock). My gf is a bit of a restless sleeper and wakes me a few times during the night, but I fall right back asleep most of the time. I usually get a 20-45 minute nap each day as well.

                    When I first got my testosterone results, I went through all the food I ate and figured out whether it was good or bad for testosterone. I was eating walnuts, almonds, flaxseed, etc every day. Turns out those are bad for testosterone. I cut those out, along with some other stuff, added in a few things to replace them, and then had the next test a month later. Those tests were done at the end of Nov and Dec, so I should do another one soon. Supposed to see a urologist next Friday. The Dec test is when I found I had low Vitamin D as well.

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                    • #11
                      Low vit d is bad for test .
                      Never heard of a problem with almonds or walnuts before .

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                      • #12
                        I'm hoping by now my Vitamin D is at least 50. I'll check again in about a month.

                        Yeah, I was surprised about walnuts and almonds as well. They have SHBG, which binds to testosterone. They are also high in polyunsaturated fat, which has been shown to reduce testosterone.

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                        • #13
                          Tibialis Raises
                          Why this?

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Anthony_gerio View Post
                            Why this?
                            I was trying to do some yoga poses and my balance sucked. Looked like these would help with strengthening ankles and increasing their range of motion.

                            Please let me know if you have a better exercise for ankle strength/ROM. Thanks!
                            Last edited by Flinius; 07-09-2021, 12:28 PM.

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                            • #15
                              Originally posted by Flinius View Post
                              I'm hoping by now my Vitamin D is at least 50. I'll check again in about a month.

                              Yeah, I was surprised about walnuts and almonds as well. They have SHBG, which binds to testosterone. They are also high in polyunsaturated fat, which has been shown to reduce testosterone.
                              The evidence on the nuts is very thin it seems to rely on a single study related to women with female trouble geting increased shbg ( not in the nuts ) . Now if it raises shbg in normal men (??) one might expect this to lower free test . The fat profile in nuts is good being high in mono unsaturates .

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