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  • Can't stop masturbating.

    So, I'm addicted to orgasming. The feeling I get etc when I do. Its gotten pretty out of hand, and it gets depressing when I tell myself ok, I'm not gonna do it, and then do it anyways, failing. I've dealt with depression a lot these last few years and although I always masturbated a lot, recently, its started to affect my ability to get erections and maintain them, sometimes very severely. I still get morning wood, but for example, I've measured 6 inches in girth before, and 7 inches in length, now its around 13.5cm-14.5cm in girth and 6 inches in length, due to weak erections. This is consistent. I know PE could help but since I can't get it up, all I can do is flaccid stretches and flaccid jelqing. I don't know if your supposed to do stretches while erect or not.

    Anyways, I've noticed a pattern in my behavior and a lot of it has to do with my situation etc. I've not worked in 3 years now, although things are starting to look up and I should be working again in the next 3-4 months. But, one of the ways I coped with that depression was fantasies during masturbation. I always felt inadequate and that things were never good enough, and always craved more, so I'd have these fantasies where i wasn't anymore. Sex is very validating so in my fantasies with these beautiful women and me finally being able to please them, and feel validated, that became addicting.

    Now, I've been masturbating since I was 12, probably almost every day, multiple times a day, so its one hell of a habit to kick. I can only go one day without masturbating before I break. That feeling of being good enough, of feeling sexy, is so strong, so when I orgasm, its like, yes, finally I'm enough, it doesn't matter I've got no money or anything, nothing matters in this moment, I'm free. That lasts sometimes maybe a couple minutes before I feel like shit.

    There is 100% nothing wrong with masturbation, but instead of honestly just, being in the mood, I'm using it as an escape. I'm getting in the mood because I want to feel validated and good enough in my fantasy. Its become unhealthy, and I'm scared that no woman IRL, when I finally get my shit together, is going to be able to stack up to these fantasies.

    What are some tips or tricks or things you guys have done to stop masturbating/looking at porn. The porn is there, but its honestly no severe because I can have a fantasy as elaborate as the plot of your favorite book all in my head, and in the end it feels like the same result. I can't stop touching myself, I'm so damn used to my hand going down there, I do it without even realizing it. Its like a comfort thing, I'm not autistic, but you've seen people with autism "stim" right, often rocking back and forth or making a noise, which comforts them. My hand will just on its own go down to my penis and fiddle with the head etc. Which is fine when you've jerked it 6 times that day, but when your trying to not stimulate yourself, it becomes very problematic.

    I also feel like crap after, especially if I do it 4 or 5 times in a row in a matter of an hour to 2 hours. I'm actually getting in shape now, in the middle of february I was 208lbs, lowest I've weighed since then was 186lbs. But masturbating just kills the motivation and makes me feel like I can't accomplish anything. These last 2 weeks I've barely exercised at all, because I'll feel shitty after failing a goal and not following through. I didn't masturbate at all yesterday, but I've cum 3 times already today. Once I start, that urge to please a woman, to finally feel like I'm enough just as I am, and fantasize about a women loving me and wanting me to fuck her etc, is such an overwhelming urge.

    I need some help guys, hope this is the right place to ask. My reasons for stopping are to get rid of this need to constantly need sexual validation, in the extreme, potentially in a way that I'd only get from a girl I'd been dating for years. And to get bigger and harder erections, and to just not be so reliant on that feeling. To have control over my urges instead of them controlling me, which they do.
    Last edited by drISlittle; 05-10-2017, 08:43 AM.

  • #2
    Hello drlSlittle,

    First off, thank you for your honesty. I don't know how old you are but this reminds of ALOT of me when I was younger. You are not ALONE IN YOUR PROBLEM I believe.

    Thanks to websites like these we are able to see that PE is ALOT more than just about getting a bigger, better dick, but also a healthier dick, mind and outlook (not to speak for all others, but I going on a hunch). I did (and sometimes still do) the same in the past. Here is what little I've learned so far (and I have been away from PE way too long and now am making my way back).

    these are not "answers' but suggestions and what has worked for me:

    1. lessen my coffee (was pretty bad)

    2. slowly ween yourself off wacking off or significant lessening (at whatever pace works). this goes for PORN too. you are desensitizing yourself from the real thing, and trust me, nothing beats the real thing. you want to experience it in all of it's beauty, glory, fun and natural lust.

    3.I learned that my wacking wasn't REALLY only about the sensation, but more about wanting to escape (which you said you already know). a KEY bit of knowledge, because I found that I kept doing it even when I DID have a girlfriend. it was more about my coping mechanisms in life that I had to (and still am) re-learning. this is a yearning that may never going away and will show up in other forms (more porn, more wacking, spending, etc. in greater severity. again, I'm talking about myself, but I know I'm not alone in this). just a potential warning.


    4.
    this one is only when you are ready (and please do not try these all at once, you might go crazy).

    either become (temporarily) a vegetarian or a vegan. why? great health benefits, weight loss 9which I wasn't necessarily looking to do, just a "side-effect" I noticed -[more when I was a vegan]).
    when combined / if you get to the level (net tip) of vegan/ no wacking off at all, BE WARNED, after about 3-4 weeks of this, you will be Monster rock hard (was for me) and you will be foaming at the mouth and seeing red when near women. this can be a good thing/ or bad. and yes, it was a GREAT diet for healthier Blood flow and better erection quality (hint hint, wink, wink)

    5. try to get to a level of NO MASTURBATING AT ALL. why? when it comes to PE, relationships, etc. this can be a VERY good thing. a lot if not all of this is a learning process. but the end result is awesome.

    and yes, I've wacked off ALOT more when I also was unemployed for nearly 2 years, and depressed. I get it. but work hard at the quality of your life and it will show up in all other areas. yes, in your dick too.

    Sorry if I went on too long. just my 2 cents.
    Last edited by Frankfurter; 05-10-2017, 09:22 AM.

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    • #3
      Reserve your ejaculations for training and sexual activity only. The discipline is something you're going to have to work at.

      The following guidelines should be of assistance to you: The Detraining Effect: Understanding and Reversing Negative Habits To Improve Erection Quality and Sexual Confidence
      Want One FREE Month of Coaching? PM or email me for details- or CLICK HERE

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      • #4
        Spend more time out in the public ! Do things with friends. Go fall in love.
        Valued Member of 11 years at the PEGym
        Looks are deceiving, mirrors don't lie.

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        • #5
          Do you watch porn? If so start by stopping that.
          Like Big Al said reserve orgasms for training and sex.

          Discipline is your key to most doors in life... You can do it!

          Comment


          • #6
            I love cocaine love the feel of it and I do it all the time, every waking moment.

            See a problem with that statement?
            7 1/4 inches x 5 1/4 inches Spring 2014
            8 X 5 1/2 late summer 2014
            8 X 5 3/4 Feb. 2015 That took a while.
            8 X 6 goal
            8 X 5 7/8 May 2015, wife said stop for now.

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            • #7
              248 days and counting without Masturbation to ejaculation. How about that for inspiration. My record is 264 days so I am getting pretty close to breaking it.

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              • #8
                Hi,

                You seem too alone. While woman can cope with it better, for us, it's disaster.

                While hard at first, develop a social life. It comes easy quickly as we humanoids are naturally social.

                As you said, working will help. We men need to work, it's in our DNA.

                Just free your self.

                My take on being a healthy man in no order of importance;

                A job
                A buddy to talk shit with
                A hobby
                A woman
                NBPEL 6 1/4" EG 5 1/4" - March 2017
                NBPEL 6 1/2" EG 5 1/2" - April 2017
                NBPEL 6 3/4" EG 5 1/2" - May 2017
                Goal; hard, strong, veiny

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                • #9
                  I think to much PMO is crushing your Spirit ( Pornography masturbation orgasm )

                  If you feel like you must beat your Meat 🤣🤣🤣 Practice Edging without ejaculation. Limit your Ejaculation to 2x-3x a week. Don't go overboard​ with masturbation for HRS with no Ejaculation.

                  Instead of fantasy try it with a real woman. Your unnecessary Ejaculation is what is making you feel like shit. Trying PE & Edging without ejaculation is the way to go. Use that extra energy to get out there & mingle or go into beast mode at the GYM

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by sir_laid_a_lot View Post
                    248 days and counting without masturbation to ejaculation. How about that for inspiration. My record is 264 days so i am getting pretty close to breaking it.
                    wow , impressive

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Meditate instead of PMO. FORCE yourself to meditate.

                      You never slow down, you never grow old!

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                      • #12
                        Damn, I started pegym 2 months ago and I've been working out for 1 month and saw some good improvements with a light newbie routine.. Second month I've been away from home (Contracts on cruise ships) and started masturbating again without following my routine anymore because I had no time for it.. I will start again on Monday without masturbation, only edging at the end, wish me luck starting it again from 0, hope i wont get 'interrupted' again soon..
                        6/21/2017 day 1

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                        • #13
                          Good luck!
                          Want One FREE Month of Coaching? PM or email me for details- or CLICK HERE

                          The MeCoach Male Enhancement Coaching Service- For All of Your Male Enhancement Needs

                          25 years of experience in male enhancement now compiled into a 192 page instantly downloadable ebook -CLAIM YOURS HERE NOW for $7 (instead of $37)

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